did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
