It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
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I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
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He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.