just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
