so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
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