he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
