it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize