why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Randomize
