that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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