Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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