i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
