I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
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I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
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Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"