11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
try to milk me bitch
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
