Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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