How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize