All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
