im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Randomize
