Pappa wants mamma naked
I just threw up on my dentist
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
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