Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
So many bounce houses so little time
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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