I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Randomize
