Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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