Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
