Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize