Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
