we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
