just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
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So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
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Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place