You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
