By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
