my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
