He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
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Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
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possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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