sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
