Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
