yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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