ugly people sure do ruin things
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Please don't give away my fajitas
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize