Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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