dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize