How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
