Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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