She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
