Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Dignity is for republicans.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
