it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
