is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
