I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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