Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
