Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize