this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Randomize
