I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
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