weddingsv make me drug and hornr
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
