Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
