It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Randomize
