Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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